Which leads me to my next topic:
A friend was telling me of a conversation she had with a church member today. Without disclosing who they are, my friend stays home with 4 children and has HUGE obligations with extracurriculars etc with them. The church member works a split shift during the day with two teenagers at home. The church member asked my friend to head up a very large activity sponsored by the ward (which is this church members calling in all honesty) and when my friend politely declined (with typical super-mormon-mom-guilt if you know what I mean) stating she was too busy to do the job asked. The church member proceeded to yell at her and guilt trip her with statements such as "well unlike you some of us have to WORK and don't have time to do things like this".
To the working world that thinks we "stay-at-homers" sit on our a**es and eat chocolate truffles all day: caring for a home and family 24/7 is harder than any job out there. I don't get to call in sick, I don't get vacation days, I don't get a break, a lunch hour, a prep period, or a quiet bathroom moment. The church member was lucky she didn't try and ask me to do it today. I wouldn't have been so nice.
Excuse my grumpiness. My legs are falling asleep and my "peaceful no stress lazy life" is screaming at the bathroom door.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Sometimes I hide from my children too. Luckily my bedroom door locks.
ReplyDeleteI knew that particular mom had been asked to help, but I didn't know it was so rudely. I have no sympathy for the woman in charge because I have been in charge for the last two years. The first year, I was working from home like crazy trying to finish a project before Jane was born and the second year my life was falling apart (no details, but trust me it was) and I had no enrichment leader. The mother of 4 you're talking about helped me out a lot as did many other women in the relief society. Callings are hard. But somehow they always get done.
And being a stay at home mom is the hardest job I've ever done.
Even if you did eat chocolate truffles all day, even if you sat on your bumpkin and watched t.v. all day, even if you got up shopped with your friends, ate lunch with your friends, took a nap and heaven forbid, made your husband make dinner, it's NONE OF ANYONE'S BEESWAX!!!!!!!!!! Sometimes I'm lazy, sometimes I'm not, but I CHOSE to live within a certain amount of money so I COULD stay home. If someone doesn't like it then I just say, "You're just JEALOUS!" p.s. this isn't Enoch, it's Holley, I'm just too lazy (hee-hee) to log in as myself:)
ReplyDeleteHope your feeling better.
ReplyDeleteI want to agree with you, being a SAHM myself...but, honestly, I can't stand the whole
'my job is harder because I stay home' or because 'I have to work on top of parenting' debate. It's hard no matter what you do and I think people should just support each other. Parents who work often feel guilty because they don't have as much time with their kids. Parents who stay home are with them 24/7 and, speaking from experience, it kicks your butt...especially if you are sick and cant take that day off.
My point is...you never know what someone else is going through. Does it excuse the way that that Sister chose to behave? Absolutely not. But maybe cut her a little slack. It may be as straight-forward as you put it...but it also very well may not.